Yes, we all like having new stuff. It is exciting and fun, although, sometimes we forget about our real needs. As lingerie addicts, we always want to try new bras. Every bra is a new experience. Something I have noticed though when showing new bras possibilities to my boyfriend in lingerie stores is that his opinion can be either: this is so great! Or “you have way better stuff at home”. Though I don’t like the second answer – when I am caught in the desire of getting something new and get a little unrealistic-, it is fair enough and should be taken into consideration.
So, I recently decided to change my shopping habits. I don’t own a lot of clothing because all my money goes into lingerie, hot chocolates, rent, and school, however, I recently realized in the process of buying more ethically, that I didn’t need to have tones of clothes. I am way happier when everything in my closet fits perfectly and matches my current needs and aesthetic even if it means I will have to wear often the same outfit. So, why could I not think the same way with lingerie?
Of course, everybody’s tastes are based on different criteria but at the end of the day, we all tend to go for a reliable option. Very often, our fun unpractical bra stays in the drawer way longer than the amount of money we spent can justify it. Now I am not saying we should only buy everyday bras, but it is also good to be aware of that.
I am in the process of getting rid of the bras I don’t wear often and as a result, I realized that I only wear the same brands all the time because they meet my expectations in terms of design, comfort, and practicality. To be honest, I go for the prettier option that fits me best and that is the most comfortable.
In my previous post, I said I needed 8 sets of lingerie which include a few solutions bras, like strapless bras or super deep plunges, depending on your needs. The goal is just to not have so many bras that you can lose one and not even notice.
If you do sport every day, you might need more sports bras than that, but for myself, who only do sport twice a week, two is way enough. A molded wired sports bra can be great for high impact sports, but if you are more of a yoga type of gal, you can reach for a lighter option as well. Of course, you know better than me what is necessary for your own comfort.
As for the 3 bralettes, this number is rather arbitrary. I just think that bralettes have a shorter lifespan than bras. Fuller bust ladies also tend to use them less often. Now, it might be worth it to get the 3 unicorns that will last long and fit well, but having tones of them might not be so useful for most of us.
My reflection on consumerism, made me realize that as a lingerie blogger, I tend to go in two weirdly opposite directions:
1- Getting less selective.
I grew up in a middle-class family originally coming from the working class, and I have always been taught to take care of my stuff for them to last a lifetime. Growing up I used to hesitate for every single thing I would buy because they had to be the perfect thing to spend my money in. Where am I going with this? Well, since money mattered a lot, I would not buy anything for the sake of trying new stuff or fulfilling some void in my life. I would think and rethink until I knew that this new thing would add-on to my life. Of course, I made mistakes, but you got me.
Becoming a blogger didn’t make me richer (actually, I am probably poorer) but I got to try so many pieces of lingerie that I don’t NEED new bras anymore. Because of that, anything that I buy is only a plus. It is neither my only chance to get a new bra nor it is a huge deal if it fails – except for the huge disappointment that it causes me.
For some time, I tended to try brands that I knew could be disappointing again and again because their ads looked pretty and their customer’s feedback was very supportive. This led me to think that they could maybe stop disappointing me if I tried enough.
I saw my very selective and thrifty self, getting less and less selective with my purchases and worst and worst at saving. I got into the addiction of owning new things, the feeling of receiving gifts from myself, and the adventure of discovering a new product. But in the end, I am still my old picky self and I end up only using the things that fit and look the best on me. I know not everything is about fit but really, I am not this person that will compromise on fit to wear something cute. My breasts don’t allow most cute things to look good if they are ill-fitting and I can’t deal with the discomfort of it either.
2-Wanting more and more luxurious stuff.
At the same time, you can definitely get hooked up by the internet always showing you more and more expensive stuff. Of course, you choose who you decide to follow, but fashion is an expensive hobby if you don’t give in to fast fashion. Anyway, you start following people who have the possibility to pay for expensive lingerie or the opportunity to work with luxury brands. Of course, you might not want to buy expensive pieces. It’s just that the things you like start getting more and more expensive. Your tastes change and then you slowly but surely become addicted to silk and expensive lace. But since you also spend your money on cheaper things that you didn’t even like that much, you can’t necessarily afford the thing you really want. It’s a vicious circle.
So now, your standards are higher and paradoxically, your lust for new things just has high. But your wallet is just the same. Are you happier, or more stressed? Personally, it is the latest. And that is what led me to actually want fewer “things”. Worrying about packages being delivered, about if I should spend money on this or that, while my money could actually be invested in something bigger than the next pretty silk robe wasn’t productive…
Also, adding extra and unnecessary decision making to your life is something that can really hold you back. That is why I prefer having fewer items to pick from in my everyday life, but items I love and I can rely on.
What do you think? Is your wardrobe sparking joy or is it a source of stress for you?
xoxo Wen